The Reality Of The Mystery Method

I went to the seminar down at Vegas over the weekend that had Mystery and Neil Strauss (Style).

Wow!

It instilled in me how much the Mystery Method really does work. If you haven't gotten the DVD's, or e-book.... It's a small price to pay for a step-by-step method for getting women of particular beauty consistently. That was my biggest realization.

This link takes you straight to a sample chapter of the Magic Bullets ebook.

Donovan

Generating Rapport Fast

By Cortez

She has to FEEL you two are soulmates, like she has known you forever. When it happens fast, you will hear the following from her: "Oh my God I don't know why I'm telling you this, I don't even know you.."

What happened?

She FEELS she knows me better then her best friend and her logical brain supplies her with information "You don't know this guy!"

And yes, rapport gets you girl!

The following is for guys who want Rapport Fast:
Attraction is naturally created between people.

With deep rapport you will get her. If not the first time you see her, then the second or third you will. She will remember you as someone special and think of you all the time. Good rapport brings the chick to you.

What to do to get in rapport, guys:

Relax. It is important. RELAX. Nervous guys, don't drink coffeine, don't look around like you escaped from jail. Act like you're alone in the most comfortable place on Earth. Make that place exist in your imagination if you have never been in a place like that.

Avoid everyday chat (weather, school, job, newspapers, movies..) you will need weeks to get rapport with that.

Skip the usual introductions and talk with her like she is your twin sister, in fact even more openly than you would with your twin sister.

Go deep (share some emotions with her, talk about yourself (example: how you fell in love first time when you were 5 years old, how you had a rabbit and he was your friend and when he died you were very sad and felt vulnerable..)

Listen when she follows with her deep story. Leave comments aside. Don't interrupt with: "That's good!", "That's funny", "Oh that's so bad for you". Just listen. Don't criticise or judge her whatever she says. Never involve in discussion. If you do so you're pushing her away. If you "agree" with her or "approve" her actions you loose trust from her. Just listen. Ask a question if something is not clear to you. When you finish asking, shut up and listen her for a while. You must NOT become her cushion. It happens in 15 mins to 2 hours, only longer in special situations. Don't make it long. If you make it long without stepping forward (kiss), there is a danger of becoming a friend, or even worse, marriage material.

Don't try hard to find common things between you two. Do it more like you're just informing yourself about her and her about your thoughts, or even better, you're just thinking loudly, with no specific objective.

Don't give her eye contact too much. Save it's power for later. Give it more and more in moments before kiss, and make a last one longer.

Cube and similar techniques can work if used on right place in right time and by skilled person. I prefer something else: use experience to explain how she feels or what she thinks or why she behaved in such way in such occasion. That adds HUGE amounts of rapport, it's quicker and less borring.

Newbies, the above is gold , I'm writing it for you instead of sleeping so *pay* *fuckin* *attention*. Re-read, apply and get that girl!

Meeting Women Online DVD's

I forgot to post a link for you to David Deangelo's Meeting Women Online DVD/CD program.

You can check out video's, testimonals, and inside techniques for making your total online experience dynamite with the ladies. It has like 5 hours of information, all for meeting women online. If you haven't yet made online dating a part of your seduction arsenal, or just starting out, I highly recommend these DVD's.



I meet some of the hottest women I date from online. (South African Model, Actresses, ppl!)



Speakers include David Deangelo, the other David's, Neil Strauss (Style), Craig, and a tonne of others.



Check out the program here.

Triple The Effectiveness Of Your Sarges In 25 Points

Tyler says: This is some of the main shiz I focus on fixing when I'm in the field. Almost EVERYONE I met so far screws up this shiz, and it totally f**ks up their sarges (pick ups).

Taught a few hundred guys by now just from meeting guys through PAIR and in workshops recently, and this is the shiz that ups their game instantly with no tactics or anything. I see this shiz ALL THE TIME. It's the BIGGEST and most COMMON problem I see after everyone I've met. This is some of the main shiz I focus on fixing when I'm in the field.

Almost EVERYONE I met so far screws up this shiz, and it totally f**ks up their sarges.

If you do this, don't feel bad. 99% of guys I meet do it to various extents (myself included).

This is the extension of the "10 alpha qualities" post, which was when I was first figuring out what this shiz meant. Back then, I was just posting observations. This post contains conclusions, having now thought about it.

ERADICATE this shiz, and your game will go up B-I-G-T-I-M-E, more than ANY tactics will help you. This is part of what's called being a "natural". Even with nothing else, if you know this stuff you'll do well socially, and probably get laid. This stuff is the KEY.

This stuff is only for people who play the REAL game, not the INTERNET ARMCHAIR GAME. So guys who don't actually PLAY can skip this, because there's not much theory in it - its directly applicable.

1) FIDGETY MOVEMENTS AND TIGHT SHOULDERS AND TAKING YOURSELF TOO SERIOUSLY OR BEING TOO BUSINESSLIKE OR "SOPHISTICATED" (not laughing or being relaxed) = very visible subconsious (or conscious) self-doubt, overcompensating through non-relaxed state, where you're prepared to deal with anything that could happen. Ever met someone who doesn't blink when you talk to them?

2) TALKING TOO FAST = worried that people will stop listening to you unless you get out something that will interest them before they leave

3) LAUGHING AT YOUR OWN JOKES = covering up that you aren't affected that others didn't laugh, and social nervousness

4) SAYING "RIGHT" OR "YOU KNOW" AFTER STATEMENTS = seeking validation that what you said was true, or saying it because others aren't

5) STANDING WITH LEGS NOT HALF A METER APART AT LEAST = worried that you'll infringe on other people's personal space

6) TALKING TOO SOFTLY OR LOUD = fear that you'll impose yourself on people and their personal space(ie: beta).. alpha males aren't afraid to project their voice.. YET, talking obviously too LOUD can also be seen as OVERCOMPENSATING. Just like guys who wear GENERIC clothes are trying to fit in, or guys who wear OUTRAGEOUS clothes are trying too hard to overcompensate. (hint: be careful with peacocking, find a style that doesn't come off this way, which can be tricky but is still very doable).. Some guys don't talk, some talk too much, etc etc.. Find appropriate balance through trial and error, which is determined through social observation,

7) MOVING YOUR HANDS AROUND WHILE YOU TALK = trying to keep the attention of the group (sometimes can be cool, but most often a form of qualifying yourself)

8) LEANING IN *or* 'PECKING' = too eager to talk.. NEVER lean in no matter how loud the environment is MAKE HER LEAN IN or just leave but NEVER lean in or "peck" as its also called.

9) FACING BODY/FEET TOWARDS HER BEFORE SHE EARNED IT = trying to gain rapport with her too eagerly.

10) CHASING WHEN SHE WALKS AWAY = hoping she'll listen. If a chick moves away from you, move your bodylanguage MORE away from her, so she'll be drawn back.. don't CHASE her... WTF?!@?!?

11) NOT WITHDRAWING (backturns, etc) WHEN SHE DOES SOMETHING THAT YOU WOULDN'T TOLERATE FROM AN UGLY GIRL OR A GUY = trying too hard to pick her up

12) ANSWERING QUESTIONS TOO QUICKLY/EARLY = too much interest in the conversation

13) TURNING YOUR HEAD (OR "SNAPPING") WHEN YOU'RE ADDRESSED = too eager to be in convo.. so if your head is facing the other direction, and a girl says something to you, turn it SLOWLY to her, don't snap it out of eagerness to hear her

14) GOING BACK TO A PRIOR THREAD THAT WAS INTERUPTED AT THE FIRST CHANCE/BREAK-IN-CONVO THAT YOU GET = trying too hard to impress them.. (ie: when a thread gets broken off in the convo, and you go back to it FIRST chance you get when the other topic ends, you look like you were WAITING to get back to it.. WHY are you so eager to get back on it, unless you don't feel comfortable around the person and you need to qualify yourself to them?) WAIT until THEY say "what was that you were saying before?", and THEN go back to it.. if it doesn't happen, *DROP IT* even if it was good.

15) NOT APPEARING MORE INTO YOUR WINGMAN THEN THE CHICK = trying too hard to pick her up.. you've known your wingman longer than her.. why do you pay more attention to her than your wing???

16) TOO EAGER TO PAY ATTENTION - SAYING "what?" IF YOU CAN'T HEAR HER, PRIOR TO BEING IN RAPPORT = too much interest in what she's saying.. if she mumbles, just STACK OPENERS into an entirely DIFFERENT topic, RATHER than saying "what?" This is f**king KEY KEY KEY. If you say "what?" you'll lose her unless you're already past attraction and into rapport. If this happens, just run a new opener and change the topic. 1- you don't look too eager, 2- you look alpha for being disinterested in what she's talking about which helps anyway

17) REPLYING WITH OVERLY THOUGHT-OUT OF LOGICAL ANSWERS OR WITH OVERLY CLEAR/FORMAL PRONUNCIATION = being concerned that you won't be accepted unless you convince really well (eg. HB: why did you ask me that... RIGHT = I'm talking. (sit and stare) WRONG = because I really need to know since I've been thinking about this for a while.. the FIRST one conveys that you won't qualify yourself to her)

18) TAKING TOO MANY SENTENCES TO STATE AN IDEA THAT COULD BE STATED IN LESS SPACE = qualifying yourself. Commander Zap emails me a few months ago: "Remember TD, don't write what you can say, don't say what you can wink, don't wink what you can smile" TIGHT. The shorter you can explain something in, the more PROFOUND you'll appear. Why? You're not qualifying yourself. (ironically I'm massively guilty of this, due to the fact that I post when I'm really tired - see #21 to spot what was wrong with this last sentence)

19) BEING BOLD INSTEAD OF CONFIDENT = that you know that you can't pick her up, so you compensate with self-defeating actions so that the snub can be on "your terms". Saying "I'm sexy right?" or "baby I want some of that" or even just approaching when the logistics are totally unrealistic is too eager, because a CONFIDENT person wouldn't feel the NEED to say these kinds of things.. these things are symptoms of OVERCOMPENSATION for INSECURITIES.. which leads to..........

20) OVERCOMPENSATING INSECURITIES = fear of not being accepted. Have you ever met a janitor who the first thing he says is "money is over-rated.. I would never get caught up in the corporate world" blah blah.. if they'd have just said "I'm a janitor" and LEFT IT AT THAT we wouldn't have even THOUGHT that anything was wrong with it.. but because they INSTANTLY start overcompensating, it comes off as overcompensating or qualifying. Same with if they BRING IT UP TOO EARLY. Like "hey, I'm Steve.. I'm a janitor and I love it".. They're TRYING to be cocky but it comes off as COMPENSATING. BE COMFORTABLE WITH YOURSELF. If you're BALD, don't say "would you love a bald man?" as a pickup line. It's not COCKY.... its BOLD. If you're bad looking, don't say "don't you think I'm sexy". Just be comfortable with yourself, and don't bring up the issue at all.

21) OVERCOMPENSATING FAILURE OR SHORTCOMINGS = fear of being judged.. if you do poorly on a presentation, or on a sarge in front of a wingman, or on a test, DO NOT SAY DUMB shiz LIKE "I'm really tired". EVEN IF you're ACTUALLY really tired, the mere act of saying "I'm tired" comes off as QUALIFYING yourself to the person. Just don't bring it up. If you have shizty clothes on, don't say "I have nicer clothes at home." Just don't bring it up. If you meet a girl when you're dressed bad, don't say "I have the coolest club clothes at home" Just don't bring it up.

22) GOING BACKWARDS IN THE PICKUP ON HER SCHEDULE = too eager to lay her.. if you've already GONE THROUGH the whole "let's ballbust and shiz test eachother" attraction phase of the pickup, and you're now in RAPPORT -> if she tries to ballbust you at this point then just WITHDRAW ATTENTION. DO NOT BALLBUST BACK. It seems COUNTER INTUITIVE, but once you've gone through that whole little attract phase, and you're now being nice to eachother in rapport, DO NOT let her rewind the sarge by answering her ballbusting with ballbusts of your own. Just withdraw attention, to show that you're not interested in going BACKWARDS in a sarge.

23) WAITING FOR HER IF SHE LEAVES FOR ANY REASON (LIKE SAYS "I'M GOING TO THE WASHROOM, WAIT HERE) = too eager and into the convo.. if she goes to the washroom, make sure you're into another set by the time she gets back.

24) OVERLY REMEMBERING DETAILS ABOUT PAST CONVOS = convo means too much to you, because the person has unusual value to you (ie: a hot chick). Of course, I'm not advocating to be a total dick, but the general rule of thumb is that if you wouldn't have remembered a FAT CHICK or a GUY saying it, then don't remember the HB9 chick saying it. If some random dude said it and you would have remembered, then FINE. If you were in an unusually intimate convo that's also fine. But otherwise FAKE forgetting, even if she's a model and you remember every word. Even forget her name. If you see a random chick from your class or work, but you never talked to her, OPEN LIKE YOU DON'T KNOW HER. Don't give into the temptation to say "we work together". Just open like a random chick, and maybe if you get snubbed then pull out that card to save face, but only as a LAST RESORT.

25) OFFERING TOO MUCH ABOUT YOURSELF TOO *EARLY* = too eager to make them like you.. subcategories of this are:

A) Verbally: if you say to a chick "yeah, I just got back from NYC (or any cool place that would impress)" or "yeah, I just got my Rolex fixed", or "yeah, my stripper ex-girlfriend told me..." then she PICKS UP on the fact that you're trying too hard to impress her.. Same with NAME DROPPING.. DON'T GIVE GIRLS YOUR RESUME TOO EARLY.. Personality conveying routines should convey personality COVERTLY, so it looks like the story is just SO COOL that its WORTH TELLING on its own accord, and it just HAPPENS to have some good things about you in it. When offering good things about yourself, don't offer boring details. Say it with less detail, and it seems less eager. INSINUATE THAT WHICH YOU ARE TEMPTED TO ELICIDATE (holy shiz, I just made up that last catchy sentence, but I've gotta say that I'm the shiz.. right?)

B) Entertaining: If you have stuff like patterns, or the CUBE, or magic, or photos, or palmreading, and you do this EARLY, it comes off as TRY-HARD. Personally I don't use any of these things, but alot of guys do, and when they bust them out prior to the chick EARNING it, it comes off TRY-HARD. Use the stuff LATER, but not right away.

C) Wanting rapport with someone who didn't earn it: WHAT THE f**k IS THIS shiz??? I swear to god, almost *EVERY* PUA I meet live in field does this shiz, and its SUPER LAME. Going up to a chick and saying "nice necklace" or "what's your name" or "where did you get that?" is f**kING DORK SUPER LAME. WHY THE f**k DO YOU CARE ABOUT THIS STUFF FROM A R-A-N-D-O-M PERSON????? The counter argument to this is that you're not hiding your desires blah blah blah she's a hot girl and she should be happy that you're approaching, but this is INTERNET RHETORIC.. and this approach is STILL hiding your desires behind the GUISE that you're nice, so even if the rhetoric was true, it would STILL be ineffective... In the INTERNET ARMCHAIR GAME this stuff is FINE, but in the REAL FIELD GAME this shiz screws you over before you've even started gaming. It's f**king bullshiz, and NOBODY who isn't very goodlooking or socially proofed (or whatever high value) PRIOR to going in, can make this kind of approach work consistently on HB8.5+ chicks. TRYING FOR RAPPORT TOO EARLY IS QUALIFYING YOURSELF TO HER BECAUSE SHE HAS NOT EARNED IT.

D) Talking without feedback: When you're talking to someone, and they don't give feedback, and you're talking and talking, you BETA YOURSELF. It's a DOWNWARD SPIRAL, where you start talking TOO MUCH, and you SENSE that you're qualifying yourself, so you overcompensate EVEN MORE by TALKING and TALKING more and more.. Then you feel more and more beta'ed because you qualified yourself, and you're left treading water, grabbing at ANYTHING that will impress the person, so you keep talking in hopes of saying that one thing that will impress them. AVOID this by not talking too much unless THEY give some feedback. IN THE FIELD you do this by PAUSING and FORCING them to fill in the awkward gaps.

Tyler

SPG on Long Term Relationships (LTR)

I emailed our friend SPG over at SPG Diaries, and asked him what his secrets were for creating a significant amount of attraction within LTR's. He emailed me back and I wanted to share with you the email with his permission.

First off, you're right, my "specialty" is LTRs, as far as I have a specialty in any aspect of the game. I'm relatively poor at PU. I certainly don't have the skillset of a Mystery or a Tyler Durden, who are super outgoing and can just knock women's socks (or pants) off with their charm. I have my outgoing "moments," but I also can come off as shy and am more on the quiet side.

Yet I can consistently get women into LTR, or, as is the case for me now, MLTRs, which I'm amazed to find is a difficult issue even for some really great PUAs. I've been riffing on "prespective" in my blog lately, and it's interesting that guys who I would consider to have "game" that I'd aspire to (guys I would consider WAY out of my league) would turn to me for relationship advice.

So here's what I do. First off, I live by the rule that I do what I want and don't do what I don't want. For me, that's just a family trait, but it sets the frame as "this is my world, and any woman who comes in is going to be living in my world on my terms." And that's true whatever your terms may be.

In my case, I make it clear that, first of all, I'm a father first. I do this by talking about my son - not too much. But I have some really good "cute stories" about my son. I'm genuinely proud of my son and love him more than anything, so the conviction is there, but I'm communicating that I'm not going to hide that I'm a father to seek her approval, that I've got somebody whose very important in my life (other commitments) and that I can not only take care of myself but another human being. Some guys like to hide the fact that they're a father, or apologize for it, but I go the opposite way - I embrace it. That kind of conviction, combined with good story-telling, is BIG. (BTW, all of the women I'm currently dating have never been married and have no kids. Two are under 30; one is 23. In other words, any woman can fall for the single dad.)

Another thing I do, usually as early as the first date, is talk about how people tend to get into relationships too early, usually through a humorous story about some poor sap I know who jumped into a relationship way too soon. I'll usually mention that I'm not looking for a wife. This is important, because I want to weed out the women who are looking for a ring. I don't say that I never want to get married (I might), but that's not what I'm looking for right now.

I'm not afraid of rejection, of having the woman walk away or whatever. If she doesn't like kids, good riddance; if she can't hold her end of a conversation, I'm not going to help her out; if she doesn't have a sense of humor, she's out; if she's looking for a husband to drive the kids in the minivan, keep looking; if she's not cool, forget it. I'm pretty mellow, take very good care of myself, I'm smart and I bring a lot to the table - I expect a woman whose compatible with that. It sets a high bar.

The first several dates are all about attraction. Keep it fun, get physical early, keep the passion high. Don't see her too often, don't call or email too often. Keep myself busy with other things, date other women no matter how much I like her. I don't do canned openers or routines, I'm just my natural self. I do tell stories and I have a goofy side that I'll share during "pillow talk." I've found that most women, especially really attractive women, have a really goofy side, but they're often afraid to bring that out. If she can feel comfortable being silly with you when you're naked together after sex, you're a keeper in her book.

Every date is on my terms. If I want to stay in, we stay in; if I want to go out, we go out. I keep my life very interesting (this is key - you need to have an awesome world to bring her into where she's safe & excited). I'm always doing new & cool things - wine tasting, skiing, skydiving, hiking, fishing, mountain biking, traveling. And I bring her into that world by telling her stories about it (or bringing her along, if we've been together long enough). Over time, I'll let her into more of my world, but there are always things that I keep for myself. I don't like GFs who are joined with me at the hip, and I'll come right out and say that. I'll laugh about the couples with those cute little matching ski outfits who can't take a dump without calling their sweetie to tell them about it (you can riff all day on that one - it's great).

We're always either trying new things (new restaurants, places to go, etc.) or just being horny rabbits in the bedroom. If every time she comes over she's having toe-curling orgasms, she's not going to care that every date is just her coming over for sex. Then when you do go outside the bedroom (dinner, movie, whatever), she's going to think she's on vacation.

So bottom line, I lay out my reality early on, I set a high bar for her to jump over, I work hard on improving myself, I lead an interesting life and keep parts of it off-limits, I make attraction the #1 priority and every date and the entire relationship is on my terms from the very beginning. And I'm just myself from day one. (My blog is just me being me, if you want some perspective.)

I like his advice. Alot of his traits seem to come from the teachings of David Deangelo, however these might his natural traits.

Dressing For A Night On The Town

This is taken from an Askmen post, awesome shiz. I think it is extremely applicable to us, because we usually head out to bars, clubs, etc. This could drastically improve your game. By Daniel J. Indiviglio


There are many ways to stand out in a bar setting -- not all of them good. During a recent visit to a super-trendy bar in the East Village of New York City, I noticed that everyone at the bar looked relatively hip and well-dressed, except for one poor soul. This guy wore an argyle sweater vest with a striped dress-shirt and khakis. If he were going for the "Emo" look or playing shuffleboard with his 80-year-old grandfather, that might have been okay. Sadly, this was not the case, and a part of me felt bad for him. He was, at worst, an average-looking guy, but he was dressed terribly for a night out in New York City.

Dressing properly and stylishly for a night out can sometimes be challenging. You want to stand out from others for your impeccable style, not because of inappropriate attire. In the spirit of the plight of the poor guy in the sweater vest, I wish to take this opportunity to assist anyone who needs help dressing for a night on the town. By following a few simple guidelines, you can avoid embarrassment and draw the right kind of attention to yourself.

Know your environment

You usually know where you're going before getting dressed. Consider three factors in assessing your attire choices.

1- Geographical location
Different cities have different general atmospheres. You can get away with a T-shirt in virtually any club in Miami, while few clubs in New York City consider T-shirts appropriate attire. In your hometown, you probably have a good idea of the kind of setting to expect, but when visiting a city foreign to you, ask the locals about the nightlife's ambiance.

2- Atmosphere of destination
If you know your evening's destination(s), you are ahead of the game. Ask friends who have been there before what to expect, or take five minutes to use the wonders of the Internet to look for descriptions of the destination(s). Websites like Citysearch or Shecky's (for info on NYC, LA, Boston, and Chicago) provide helpful details about restaurants, bars and clubs.

3- Weather
Finally, use the Internet one more time to see what Mother Nature has in store. If the forecast mentions cold weather, dress warmly. You do not want to be the guy in the corner shivering and rubbing his runny nose. If the forecast calls for rain, either bring a pocket-sized umbrella or wear a water-resistant jacket and shoes that can get a little wet without being ruined.

A visible waistline without a belt? Oh, the horror...

From the bottom up

Here are some surefire recommendations for all aspects of your wardrobe when going out.

Shoes
A man's shoes set him apart from the crowd. Shoes allow you to express your character better than any other article of clothing. For starters, never wear athletic sneakers. Some casual establishments will allow you to get away with trendier sneakers, by designers such as Kenneth Cole or Diesel. Good-looking shoes that seem too casual for a wedding are always your safest bet. Sandals are for the beach.

Best bet for any venue: Sketchers "Scanner - Examiner" (black)

Socks
Socks are easy. Your socks should have simple, solid colors or very mild patterns. I suggest staying away from pastels, but instead focus on neutral colors such as black, brown, navy blue, or gray. They should match your shirt, pants or shoes.

Best bet for any venue: Tommy Hilfiger "Signature Sock" (black)

Pants
If your venue is casual, stylish designer jeans might be appropriate. In less casual circumstances, flat-front pants seem the safest. Avoid pleats. Sometimes jeans will be too casual, but pants are rarely too formal, unless you vastly misjudge your destination. Unless you plan on going to a bar on the beach, leave your shorts at home.

Best bet for any venue: DKNY Men's Black Stretch Gabardine Pant

Belt
If the waistline of your pants will be showing, you should wear a belt. If you tuck your shirt in, then you absolutely need one. If you don't tuck your shirt in and your waistline isn't visible, wearing a belt is optional. Of course, if you need a belt so that your pants stay up, you should probably wear one. Remember: Crack kills. A final tip -- always match your belt to your shoes.

Best bet for any venue: Kenneth Cole "Valasko" (black)

Wow them with your outerwear...

Shirt
When it comes to your shirt, you probably have more options than any other article of clothing. I would generally advise against a T-shirt, unless a sufficiently casual destination awaits. Your next option consists of a shirt with buttons. This includes short-sleeve shirts, which are acceptable at not-too-swanky destinations during late spring or summer. The long-sleeve, button-down shirt is your safest option. Even at most casual destinations, a long-sleeve shirt will not seem too formal. Sweaters can look good at less formal venues, but stick to either solids or very mild patterns.

As far as general tips for color, if you have a dark complexion, you should not be afraid of bright colors or pastels. If you can pull them off, they will set you apart from the pack of blue and black shirts. Not sure what you can pull off? Go shopping with a friend whose fashion sense you respect. Ask your friend for feedback regarding potential wardrobe additions.

Best bet for any venue: Kenneth Cole Floral-Jacquard French Cuff Shirt

Outerwear
When it comes to outerwear, check the weather. You should have an overcoat for more formal spots, and a jacket for less formal spots. Some formal venues require a sports coat. If such a possibility exists, call ahead and check. The same goes for a tie, which would otherwise be extraneous. Other than to keep your neck warm in conjunction with a coat, do not wear a scarf unless you are auditioning for a part in a stage version of The Birdcage.

Best bet for any venue: Marc New York Black Lambskin Zip Front Jacket

Enjoy your evening

By accurately anticipating the atmosphere of your destination, you can follow the rules above and feel comfortable with your attire. As for standing out from the pack, that comes from developing your own personal style, which begins by learning what you can and cannot pull off.

As long as you stay within the bounds of the general principles outlined above, you can safely avoid being the guy that gets mocked and heckled by strangers. At the very least, you can avoid being the guy in the argyle sweater vest. I can only hope he reads this article.

David Deangelo's Thoughts On Valentine's Day

OK, 'twas the night before Valentine's Day and all through the house, not a creature was stirring... well, except for David D., who's up late writing another newsletter for you.

...And since I basically defiled a cherished Christmas poem to begin with, it's probably worth mentioning that technically it's the night BEFORE the night before Valentine's Day for me...

Whatever.

So, I have been thinking a lot about Valentine's Day lately... and I've been talking about it with friends as well.

As I was reading some of my AO-Hell email, I noticed that there were not one... not two... but THREE different ads inside of EVERY email viewer window selling FLOWERS for Valentine's Day. You gotta love AO-Hell's way of sneaking those ads into every one of your emails, huh?

ANYWAY, as I was realizing what BIG BUSINESS Valentine's Day must be, I started wondering...

Where the heck did Valentine's Day come from?

So, I decided to do a little research.

Well, as it turns out, there are several different stories about the origin of Valentine's Day. But one of them is by far the most common.

Wanna hear it? Here it goes...

So, back in about the year 270 A.D. or so, there was a priest named, you guessed it, Valentine. Some versions of the story said that he was a Bishop. Either way...

In those days the Emperor needed men for his army and he decided that it wasn't good to have men marrying up with women... because then the men would be more attached to their families than the army.

So, the Emperor OUTLAWED marriage.

Yep, he said, "It's illegal to get married".

Those were the days, huh?

OK, so Priest and/or Bishop Valentine decided that he was going to help young lovers out by marrying them in SECRET.

Well, the Emperor got wind of this business, and put a stop to it in a "New York Minute".

So, here's Priest/Bishop Valentine sitting alone in prison and who comes along? The super-babe, young daughter of the jail owner's daughter... and, of course, he falls in love with her.

One version of the story I read said that she was blind and he healed her of her blindness.

In any event, right before his execution (yeah, they killed him for performing marriages), he wrote a letter to this girl he was in love with and at the end signed it "From Your Valentine".

And then he was executed.

OK... Fast forward several centuries, and now everyone is out buying heart-shaped cards, chocolate, and long-stemmed red roses for women who have come to expect them.

Gotta love it!

Aside from me wanting to know what the HECK a Catholic Priest was doing falling in love with a youngster way back in the year 270 (Over 1,700 years before this kind of thing was fashionable), I want to know how this turned into men chasing women around with gifts in the year 2006!

I get it, I get it. It's nice to have a day out of the year to celebrate your love for that special someone in your life. Very cute.

And if you're reading this right now and you're married... or you've had a girlfriend for a year or two... then by all means, get her some flowers and chocolate... and one of those cute pink cards.

But what about the REST of us?

Well, here's a little gem of wisdom from one of my all time favorite books, "The Rules". Yeah, the book that teaches women how to manipulate men into marrying them...

Here's it is:

"RULE 12: Stop dating him if he doesn't buy you a romantic gift for your birthday or Valentine's Day."

Nope, I'm not kidding.

By the way, a whole CHAPTER is dedicated to this rule in the book.

In the chapter, it basically says that if a man doesn't buy you jewelry (or some other romantic gift) for one of these holidays, then you should dump him, because he's not going to buy you the "big gift" of an engagement ring.

Now, before I present my radical extremist opposing perspective, I must first give you the disclaimer...

I think that long-term relationships are great, and if you're one of the lucky guys on this planet who has found a really exceptional woman, then more power to you, and I hope she likes the romantic gifts that you got her. Really.

But, for all the rest of us single guys (or guys who have just started dating a woman), I think that Valentine's Day can be kind of a drag.

Why?

Because there's another, more "subtle" message that this whole event communicates: The way to win a woman's heart is to buy her flowers, gifts, and jewelry... and to confess your feelings for her. And if she still doesn't like you, then you probably didn't get her enough gifts, or say the right things in the card.

While this idea of giving romantic gifts to show your love might be wonderful and healthy for LONGER-TERM relationships, it's usually a HORRIBLE concept for guys to use with women that they have just met, or who they've only dated a few times.

Even worse, for guys who don't have the skills to meet women and get dates, it's downright DEPRESSING.

I think that the Valentine's Day section of all stores should have a sign that says "No one who has been in a relationship less than 6-12 months allowed".

Why's that?

Because, if you "Go Valentine's Day" on a girl that doesn't know you very well (especially an unusually attractive one), you'll probably only be talking to her for another week or two.

Here's the problem...

MOST of the things that us guys have been brought up believing about how to "pursue" women is WRONG.

IT DOESN'T WORK.

Your mom loved you, but all that stuff she taught you about how to be a nice, respectable, ass-kissing Wuss Bag was waaaaaaayyyy off the mark.

See, the period from when you first meet a woman, up until the first 10 dates or so, is VERY different from ALL OTHER TIMES IN YOUR LIFE.

All of the rules you've learned about how to behave, how to be "nice", how to "make friends", how to treat people with kindness, etc., are USELESS here.

And EVEN WORSE, all the things you've learned about how to pursue women with gifts, food, and compliments will BACKFIRE on you big time if you use them here.

THIS PART OF THE GAME IS DIFFERENT.

And events like Valentine's Day, no matter how well-meaning they might be intended, definitely program us single guys with the WRONG way to behave around women we're attracted to (but not in a long-term relationship with).

So, what's the answer?

What should we be doing on Valentine's Day?

And how should we be feeling?

Well, here's a little self-tester and self-help quiz for you. If the statement and question applies to you, then do what comes after it...

1) "I just met this girl and I really like her. Should I go out and buy her something really nice for Valentine's Day?"

>>> If you just met her, then you should probably hold back... no big gifts. If you get a big, romantic gift for her, you're going to give her the idea that you're VERY into her. At this point, most women go into "play hard to get" mode, and become more and more difficult. If you really like her, do the things that have worked to attract
her... don't turn into a needy Wuss who seems like he's trying to buy her love and approval.

2) "I'm afraid that if I don't buy my girl something really nice for Valentine's Day, she'll leave me. What should I do?"

>>> The quack psychologist inside of me has a message for you: If you're insecure about your relationship with a woman to the point that you believe you have to BUY her attention, then HIT THE ROAD. If you're dating a woman who is interested in you for ANYTHING other than the feeling she gets from being with you... then you're in big trouble, and you don't even realize it. Down the road, she's going to be your worst nightmare. Trust me.

3) "I'm single and lonely. What can I do to get over this feeling of loneliness?"

>>> The BEST thing you can do is get out there and meet some women! Duh!

I was just chatting with a couple of different friends of mine who are both GREAT with women. They're both single guys who meet women anytime they want.

As it turns out, both of these guys had to LEARN these skills.

They started out having almost ZERO success with women.

We were talking about Valentine's Day, and how most guys run around chasing after women... buying them things... and generally acting needy with women that they hardly know... hoping to get some love and approval.

Here are a couple more things that both of these guys have in common:

1) They both have TONS of women calling them all the time.

2) They both avoid buying a Valentine's Day gift for ANY of the women they're seeing.

Their perspectives (and mine, as well) are that if you know how to meet women anytime you want, and women are attracted to you because of the FEELINGS that they get when they're with you (as opposed to the thing you buy them), then YOU get to make the rules.

My point is that if you are lonely and you're feeling bad about all this Valentine's Day business, then get up and DO something about it.

Get some skills. Meet some women.

Be the guy who GETS Valentine's Day gifts... instead of the guy who GIVES them.

You watch.

Mark my words, next week or the week after, in one of these newsletters, you're going to see stories from guys who had women buying them all kinds of fancy things for Valentine's Day. And then the guy will mention that he got gifts from two or three other women as well.

I can remember when I used to think that I had to buy women jewelry, flowers, and gifts to get their love and approval and affection.

I did that for years.

And it never worked very well.

Well, after spending several YEARS studying the secrets that "naturals" use to attract women, I can see WHY it never worked very well.

If you want to be one of the guys who GETS all the gifts on Valentine's Day... and who has his phone ringing off the hook from women calling HIM, then I recommend you check out my eBook.

Inside, I'll teach you all of the steps to turning the odds in your favor... and how to meet the kinds of women that you've always wanted.

Valentine's Day is a pain for a lot of guys. But it doesn't HAVE to be that way. Take some action and take things into your own hands.

My eBook is here:

http://www.DoubleYourDatingResources.com/e/10000/eBook/

Your Friend,

David D.

Fashion - Making A Great First Impression

I thought I would include a small guide to making a great impression with your fashion sense, and when a woman first meets you. Taken from Askmen.com.



It's superficial, but it's a reality -- people look at you, and in an instant you are judged based on the way you look. You could be rich as hell, but if you're dressed like a bum, mustard stains and all, you will be perceived accordingly. That's why it is important to look your best whenever you go out or have company.

Here are some tips that will always keep you looking your best.

Before you leave the house:

Take a shower every morning
There's just no excuse for missing a shower when you wake up, before you go out for the night or after a workout. Water, soap, towel. Simple.

Check your face
You don't necessarily have to shave, but at least ensure that your face is clean and free of "debris." A quick look in the mirror to check for nose hair, stuff in your beard or crust in your eyes doesn't take more than a few seconds, and is well worth the effort.

Groom your hair (ear, nose, chest, head, etc.)
Hair growth happens with regularity, so make trimming and upkeep part of your routine. Wash and condition your hair every day (or every other day, depending on your hair type and length). Set aside one day a week (preferably a Saturday or Sunday, when you have more time) to tend to ear, nose and chest hair.

Clean your hands
In the business world, handshakes can make or break you; in the dating world, a woman expects to see nice hands. So all you have to do is cut your nails regularly, scrape away the dirt with a "nail cleaner" or a nailbrush (which you can keep in the shower to save time), wash your hands frequently (to avoid sweaty, sticky hands), and use lotion on occasion (to keep them smooth).

Apply lip balm
There is nothing worse than looking at chapped lips, and trust me, no girl will want to kiss them. Find a good lip balm and use it regularly. Just don't put too much on, or it will end up looking like lip gloss. And if you don't like applying it in public because of the unmanly look it portrays, then do it in private when you go to the bathroom.

Dress with style and make sure you always look like a million bucks..

Dress well
You don't need a suit (unless the occasion calls for it), but you should always wear clean clothes that are wrinkle-free and smell good. In other words, wear clothes that were just in your drawer or closet, not your hamper.

On a related note, select clothes that fit. After you put on your clothes, take a look in the mirror for a few seconds to make sure they fit properly. Yes, their preferred fit will vary over time as styles change (along with your body and taste), but the key here is to pay attention to what you're putting on.

Use some sort of scent
Many guys go to town wearing some sort of fragrance, using everything from scented soap and deodorant to aftershave and cologne. Other guys prefer not to use anything. Like most things in life, the answer is moderation. Pick one scent (otherwise you'll combine fragrances, which will result in a weird smell) and go with it. Just make sure it isn't too strong and make sure not to bathe in it. One final note: Don't skimp on cost here; cheap cologne will act like repellant.

Shine your shoes
People tend to look at your shoes right away. If dress shoes are appropriate, make sure they're shined. If you're wearing casual shoes, make sure they look clean and new. Tattered shoes tell the world that you either don't have money or don't care -- neither option is attractive.

Once you're out:

Have proper posture
Good posture is important for you and your appearance. Focus on sitting and standing up straight. If you need a little extra help, do some posture exercises to strengthen your core muscles.

Scan your attire
Throughout a long day at the office, your clothes are likely to shift and get stained. After lunch and maybe again before you leave the office, check yourself in the mirror or look down to see if any adjustments are in order. As a side note, an untied tie is not a good look -- either keep it on or take it off.

Check your smell
Sweat happens, but it's also the enemy. Take a whiff of yourself every few hours and keep some fragrance (cologne, deodorant or body spray) on hand to freshen up. Also, if you sweat a lot, consider wearing an undershirt to prevent getting sweat stains on your shirts. To make sure you smell good from head to toe, apply talc powder on your feet to stay dry, especially if you're not wearing socks with your shoes.

Perform a quick facial check after you eat
Take a few minutes and use the bathroom mirror after you eat. Scan your teeth, nose and facial hair for any evidence of your meal or beverage. Ideally, you'd also brush your teeth, but if that isn't an option, then use a toothpick, mouthwash, gum, or mints.

You'll be judged by your cover
If you look good, you feel good, and if you feel good, you give off those vibes that tell the world that you feel great. Make your impressions count by letting your appearance show off what you have going on inside. And make frequent use of those mirrors. You don't have to be a woman about it, but you should check them as often as you can.

When To Call... What To Say If She Flakes... How To Finally Handle It!

This is one of the best posts I've read in the last few months. It helps clears up so many issues I've personally had recently. It comes from the "King" of Social Analysis, Tyler Durden of Real Social Dynamics:

Enjoy, and post your thoughts about it!



I get a phone call from an ex-girlfriend that I'm still close with. We still hook-up, but I value her more as someone who I can talk to now. I think that may change when I stop travelling and I'm around more. For some reason, she's an anomaly who is very self aware of her tendencies. That is, as opposed to most girls I meet, who only offer useless socially conditioned rhetoric, whenever you ask them about male/female interaction.

Over the course of the conversation, the topic of dating comes up. I ask, "What does it mean when you meet up with a guy, have a great time, maybe even kiss, but then when he calls you don't go out with him? Like you make up excuses and don't return his calls."

She replies, "Well there's this guy, Chris, who I met the other night. I really liked him. I offered him my number. He called me the other night, and asked me to meet up. I told him 'You know what, I think I actually will. Let me call you back.' I really wanted to meet up. For some reason I never did though.

"The thing is, that I can feel the emotion that I felt when I gave him my number, at the time that we're talking on the phone. But the second we hang up, poof, it's gone. Also, I actually have scheduling issues. It's not like this is someone who I'm already friends with, who I'd give priority to. This is some new person that I barely know.

"If he happens to catch me at the right time, I'd go out with him. But I won't take the time or go out of my way to return his calls. I don't call guys."

I reply, "So theoretically, you're sufficiently attracted to this guy that under different circumstances you could have wound up sleeping with him. Or even gotten into a five year relationship, for all you know. But just because of ill luck in
timing and because he actually believed that you'd call him back, now you'll never see him again.

"Is this weird to you at all?"

She replies, "Nope. It makes perfect sense. I don't care either way, because I have guys available to me at all times so it's my last priority. That guy was cool and I thought he was cute, and maybe I'll see him again later or something. I also just
give out my number to be social most of the time. It doesn't mean I have any intentions at all."

I reply, "He could use that opportunity to continue the interaction to generate attraction down the line, no?"

She replies, "It's happened before. Really I just don't want to meet new guys. I like being social when I'm out. But if I'm attracted to a guy, I'll probably flake on him. I've already slept with enough guys (she's nineteen years old, and has been
with five guys), I don't want to sleep with anymore right now.

"When I was with my two friends hanging out at these guys' house, we made each other promise not to let each other do anything because the guys were cute."

I reply, "OK that makes sense. What if he's really good looking? Does that make a difference? Also, do you think that when he calls it's better for him to chat you for a while, so you can be reminded of why you gave him your number in the
first place? Or should he just call and immediately try to make plans? Also, do you think it's better to call you out on your bullshit in a funny way if you flake?"

She answers, "Looks means nothing when it comes to that stuff. I know within seconds if I could or couldn't sleep with a guy. I knew within seconds that we'd have sex, the night that we met."

I reply, "Are you serious? I don't think that my looks are on a level that you'd want to sleep with me the second you saw me."

She replies, "True. But it's in your energy. The way you come across. I can't explain it. As long as you're not morbidly disfigured your looks won't be the main thing I judge on. Girls all say they want looks, but they wind up with guys who aren't hot all the time. There's so many guys that I think are so hot, and I sit there waiting for them to talk and I'm all excited, and they're like "hi" with some stupid line, and they sound retarded and act weird. It's such a letdown, and most hot guys are like that."

I reply, "Do you think the 25 point list I showed you has to do with that kind of stuff?"

She replies, "Yes, definitely. Also stuff that you don't have in there, like just your voice and facial expressions."

I reply, "OK, what about the other stuff with calling girls out on bratty behaviour? Like confronting her for flaking?"

She replies, "Well if a guy tries to argue with me, I'll just hang up on him. He would have to do it in a totally funny way that doesn't make me upset or annoyed."

I reply, "Last night, I call up this flaky girl, and say 'You're so annoying to get a hold of! It's so cute though, you're so confused and disorganized. It's like you're my bratty little sister. I don't even think I'm attracted to you anymore, I just want to take care of you and help you get organized like a big brother.'... Then she started giggling and said 'No no no.. I'll meet up with you, don't think of me like that!'.. Do you think that was a good approach?"

She replies, "Yeah definitely. That was funny and if you did that to me, I'd be like "Oh yeah, well maybe I WILL meet up with you then!"

I reply, "OK awesome. So do you think it's good to talk for like 15 minutes to remind her of what she gave you her number for in the first place, and then go for a meet?"

She replies, "Probably longer than that actually. I'm not sure. For you maybe less time because you do this stuff. But most guys have no chance unless they're lucky because I'm either bored or looking for something at that point in time. I guess
their best bet is to try to talk to me as much as possible, so I become friends with them."

-----

A few thoughts on this.

First, guys will attribute flaking to a lack of attraction. I disagree with this line of thinking. Girls go into state, and forget about it down the line. In fact, most of what occurs while a girl's buying temperature is escalated will be
forgotten by the girl. They become disassociative and cognitive dissonance kicks in.

Have you ever noticed that whatever drama happens the night you meet a girl will be forgotten if you wind up dating? It's because nothing that happens while she's in state counts to her. That's also why we don't bother worrying about whether or
not a girl has a boyfriend. She becomes disassociative when she's attracted, so it's not relevant to the interaction.

That being the case, there are a few tendencies that guys in the scene have, that I think are wrong-headed:

1- Calling a girl on her bullshit for flaking in a way that isn't cute or fun, or in a way that sounds angry or like you actually care. In my experience, the only girls who respond to that are the types who respond to this sort of behaviour in general, which is a certain type of girl that is not the majority.

2- Putting the girl in a position where she has to call you back or its over.

3- Refusing to follow up with girls who don't make it easy to meet up with them again by, and thinking that you're somehow 'NEXTing' them.

4- Thinking that all value is strictly conveyed in person, and that it is a bad idea to talk for a long time on the phone because it makes you look needy. Not that you *need* to call long. But rather, call as long as you feel like. Calibrate so as to hang up before she gets bored, but enjoy the interaction as long as you want. It's just that much more comfort building, and is only taking you that much closer to the endzone.

5- Giving up if the girl stands you up, because you think she isn't attracted.

For me, there are a few things that I'll do when it comes to the phone. First, if a girl flakes me, I'll tease her on it in a funny way. I never get angry or look genuinely upset about it. I never focus on reasoning with them logically.

I also don't give up if a girl doesn't call back. At the same time, if they say they'll call back I'll say I don't get upset like I know they won't. I'll just say "OK cool." and give them the chance. But then if they don't call back when they said they would, I'll call back a bit later and just re-initiate the conversation as if I don't even remember that they didn't follow up.

Now when it comes to the idea that "if a girl disrespects me I'll NEXT her", that isn't my frame at all. To me, you can't NEXT a girl who you haven't slept with. In my view, that's just her NEXT'ing you. It's only a girl that I'm already with that I'll do this to if she annoys me or crosses my boundaries.

For a girl I haven't slept with yet though, I have a certain beliefs. She owes me nothing. It's all a game. No relationship or connection exists between us until we've been together physically, because she reserves the right to walk away at any point. I have no emotional ties to the interaction, and I have no ego about it. I just do what I think will work.

I also believe that there is a fundamental problem with many of the social ideas about how often and when to call. For example, there exists an idea in society that waiting to call will create scarcity and value, as well as increase anticipation.

To me this is very wrong thinking. Notice that it stems from the fact that 99% of pickups in society are SOCIAL CIRCLE pickups. So for that kind of phone number, you'd have probably had the tension building for weeks or months before the number was exchanged. Of course waiting is better - it's been building for months. But for girls you met on a cold approach, that is not the case.

I know what world the girls live in. They live in the same world that I do. The world where you meet tons of girls (in their case its guys), and tons of them like you and tons of them validate you. When I get home from a club, I literally cannot remember the names or faces of girls I met.

To be more accurate, I literally barely remember the names or faces of the last three girls I had sex with. I just got off the phone with a girl that I was with less than twelve hours ago, and Jeffy and I had to think for five minutes about what her name was before I returned her call.

And I LIKED that girl.

I remember she was a hot brunette around my height, and seemed cool. But that's about it.

For girls, it's the same. They can barely remember anyone they meet, because they meet so many people. To make matters even worse, they become disassociative while they're in the club. Many of them have even had had a few drinks, but you couldn't
tell.

Of course, you can do daytime pickup. But regardless, the girls still have access to many other good looking alpha guys the second they want it.

Most guys don't even realize that it is very rare that an attractive girl is not getting laid by one or more other guys. That's even when they're single. They're still sleeping with their ex-boyfriends, or some player on the side.

It's not like a hot girl is NOT getting laid, anymore than you wouldn't be if you had the instant option. So when you're calling, they are about as motivated to meet up with you as you would be to drive across town to a good Italian restaurant, when you're eating a good bowl of Chinese right in front of you.

Sure, the Italian would be great. But you have an unlimited Chinese buffet sitting right here. Why would you be bothered?

The girls don't get that needy feeling that the guys get. They are always validated, because they've been in the club at least twice a week, getting validated by all the guys complimenting them and buying them drinks.

When it comes to how I handle the phone, I don't worry that if I call back multiple times it will make me look bad. Because I have high social value, and don't subcommunicate any neediness, I can call as much as I want.

In fact, I'll call two or three times in a row if she's not picking up, back to back. I'll call back whenever I feel like it, because it's obvious that I'm amusing myself and that I don't really care. I could take it or leave it, and I'm just having fun.

I'll call and shoot the shit, and then hassle her until she meets up. Whatever.

I also combat excuses by adding in phone freezeouts, and following them with playful teasing and some semi-logical stuff like "Hey, come chill for a few minutes. If you're bored, take off and we'll catch up later."

My goal is to have the girl on the phone ASAP. I don't want them to have any time to forget that we have plans to meet up. I'll call girls' cellphones even as I'm leaving the club and going for afterbar food. I'll have pulled a girl from the club to an afterhours food place, and run off to the bathroom to call all my numbers, while my wing occupies our set (I have a habit of pulling a two set with my wing for same night, and take numbers from the choice girls in larger sets).

Whether I reach them or not, I'll call them again as soon as I wake up the next afternoon, and get the ball rolling. I'm not thinking to make them wonder if I'll call or not, because I know they could care less. Not because they aren't attracted. Rather, because there are many attractive prospects on their plates, and regardless of my game, I'm one of many.

The difference between me and them though, is that I'll get her and they won't, because I'll play it properly.

If a girl stands me up, I'll call her and make fun of her for it. I'll hassle her to meet up. I'll say I'm still there and she had better get her ass down there, because she's my little sister and if she doesn't get down here I don't know what trouble she'll get into if she doesn't have me there to supervise her.

I don't care either if she wants her friends to come or not. All of this means nothing to me. I just want to see her again, because I'll get her no matter what she throws at me.

The difference between a day1 and a day2 is that she's there to see *me*. So she has no excuse not to come back somewhere private if we're spending time together. And from there I can escalate.

So let's summarize.

In my experience, I've found it best to get away from the idea that you're trying to make the girl fall in love with you before you hook up with her.

Focus on just showing you're a cool guy who she has the potential to be attracted to, and then make it your only priority to see her again. Don't worry about your value over the phone. You can't wreck a pickup from over a phone line. That makes no sense.

If you're the kind of guy who she's attracted to, then just act congruent to that over the phone. Call her and get her accustomed and accepting that you're in her life now. Make plans, and if she is flaky don't worry about it, and be playfully persistent by chatting her more, not by talking non-stop about the flaking. Meet, have fun, connect, isolate, and from there its up to you.. :)

Tyler

Hmm... How To Make Voicemail Work For You!

Reprinted from an email:

"You need to understand the story to appreciate the phone message.

A couple of weeks ago, on a Sunday at a church, this guy was staring at my little sister's friend all through the meeting. He was a normal looking guy, and she is cute girl. After the service ended, he bolted to the end of her pugh, and stumbled his way through an invitation to go out some time. She felt a little awkward, but giving him the benefit of the doubt that he was just nervous, she gave him her phone number and said "sure they could hang out sometime." A few minutes later as she was getting into her car to drive home she got a text message, from this nervous boy, saying how excited he was to go out with her and how gorgeous he thought she was. Feeling a little more uncomfortable, the girl brushed it off and went about her day.

THE FOLLOWING DAY SHE RECEIVED THE ATTACHED PHONE MESSAGE FROM THIS SAME BOY!

Now I don't claim to be Casanova (despite the constant comparisons) but, in this situation, I ask you. . . .Is this the phone message that you would leave with a girl, the day after you meet her at church, when trying to play the game, play it cool, play hard to get, and impress her? If this doesn't paint the perfect stereotype picture of why so many men are single at 40 and confused why it never worked out with a lady I don't know what does. Ok, now listen to the attached phone message"

Click here to download the MP3.

Let me know how effective this is guys,

Donovan

If A Woman Talks About Other Men

The model I went out with recently commented about how she had a date with a guy next Friday and therefore couldn't "hang out".

I think this is awesome!

If a woman mentions something about other men, most guys think shes trying to blow you off. However, I intepret it as her trying to qualify herself to you, because you obviously see other women, and she doesn't want to feel as if she isn't worth you're attention. A DHV for her!

There are alot of disagreements about this from AFCs, and other (less successful) within the community.

As David DeAngelo says, "tests" as this one is, are always usually a great IOI (Indicator of Interest), that can only reaffirm her attachment to you further.

A test?

Yes, a test. Because you could say, "Oh you're going on a date..., oh ok. Great. Cool" (AWKWARD!)

Or...

"Oh thats awesome, I'm glad you're getting attention from men these days!" "Why don't you cancel it with him, so you could have the possiblity of hanging out with me instead?" (She rarely will cancel) Just say "Joking, I already have plans, we can hangout next week when we both have some time."

Any other lines we could use? Comment.

Donovan

Afternoon Delight Music Video

Something off base quickly today. My girlfriend sent me this video. My favorite DVD has been Anchorman for awhile now, and Afternoon Delight is somewhat related to seduction... ?!

"I don't know how to put this, but I'm kind of a big deal..."
-Ron Burgandy

Enjoy!

Neil Strauss and Jessica Alba (Video)

Hey, I finally uploaded my Jimmy Kimmel Live video so all you guys can watch Style on TV.

I uploaded to Google Video. You can view it here



Donovan

From Nerd to PUA

Hey, check out this Loverboy video about his transformation from AFC to stud. It's pretty funny if nothing else. (If he has a chance like that... what are the better looking guys capable of... j/k)

"Tribute To Sarging" by Loverboy

Video taken down.

How To Transition To Boyfriend Status

How to go from pickup to boyfriend status... my dilemna!

I was curious I'm fairly comfortable with pickup, seduction, but those first 2-3 months seem to be the most essential for getting that high quality girl as your girlfriend.

Any tips on the transition from cocky funny, alpha male, etc through to having her wanting to be your boyfriend? (Obviously you wouldn't remove that from you're game totally) There is a point where it can become too much, or the material runs low.

Strategies, ideas, techniques for the transition from casual relationship to committed relationship?

My thought's are: how do you not start to appear needy, etc and how do you generate that desire in them to start being interested in being your girlfriend. I'm talking 2-3 month period here, after intimacy, after 10-14 hours of hanging out.

Post your comments below!

Along Came A Model...

I think I can die happy soon...

I had a date with a HB9 last night. She's South African, 5'10, and extremely cool.

I actually met her online, through a college friends site. I messaged her saying if she knew someone at her high school etc. We conversed for 15 minutes on MSN, got her number, and she owed me hot chocolate for me telling her my height (5'8 haha).

I think the trick was while we were talking on MSN, it setup the overall frame. I played a very charming role, but didn't hestitate to bust on her when she displayed what we both call a "model moment".

A part of the conversation went something like this when I tried to setup the date:

Her: I've actually got a class Tuesday from 9-10.
Me: That's amazing, is that a special class for insominacs?
Her: Its for blah blah class.
Her: Oh wait. You mean at night?
Me: And you were doing soooo well!
Her: Haha. No WAY! That was a blonde moment.
Me: Wow, defintely a model moment there.
Her: I'm not like that normally!!
Me: I'll have to take you're word for it...

Anyways, all we did for the date was go to a service station get some hot chocolate, went to a park, sat and talked. I DHV'd through stories, mindreading (even if she didn't pick 7, I said she had some weird aura that destroyed the process), busting on the mistakes guys make with her (treating her too nice, etc) and displaying a brief vunerable side. Towards the end of the night, she said "You know why I like you so much?" I said, while holding up my hands "I don't really have enough fingers on my hands, but give me just ONE." "Because you don't treat me like glass!" "Guys are way to nice on dates, and never tease me when I have a blonde moment, they just act like it didn't happen!"

And on...

I basically asked her in an intial message if she knew this girl that looked like a celebrity, like I mentioned earlier.

Well, she asked what my darkest secret is... and I told her.

I said: "I never needed to know if you knew that friend from school, I could find out in 5 minutes what her phone number is through a friend."

She said with a huge smile and blushing: "I'm so flattered!"

I presume she already knew that though, but it showed balls admitting it.

I think just like David Deangelo says, is you can say charming, almost corny things if you get her in the right frame. This showed her that I wasn't all cocky and funny, or alpha. I did have a side that was "human", or "emotionally vunerable". The reason for that is, it took balls to say that. Normally a guy will never tell them the excuse, and I normally wouldn't either, but the frame was there that I was dominant from DHV's, her IOI's, throughout the 2 hour date. (But you have to calibrate, and you don't want to be too dominant, just alittle abit, you still want to seem attainable as The-Approach article I posted a month ago talked about) This was last night.

She called me this morning at 8am and woke me up, and told me 3 days in advance that she forgot about driving school (shes pushed it back 4 times) that she must take, and suggested hanging out after, and also Saturday. (Last night we setup to go to a Volleyball game for Fri)

I'll keep you posted on this gem as it develops further,
Donovan